I'm just gonna call this the greatest news ever. so much so that it needs its own blog entry. Its also going to have co-op play probably making this game of any year its released. This year or next i'm waiting for you DR2.


http://www.eurogamer.net/articles/dead-rising-2-does-have-multiplayer

Disappointment were all familiar with the grunting sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach which is not quite the need to poop or indigestion. It lingers on and stick with you much like a child hell bent on ruining your day.


So here we have the 5 most recently Disappointing things.


5.The KIA

Perhaps the shock trailer of Mass Effect 2 showing up after confirming that we could transfer our original Mass Effect data and our commander Sheppard across kind of puts a damper on what it appears bioware has been trying to do. The idea that you will no longer play the much beloved created character from the first game brings back fond memories of Knights of the old republic 2.


This is bad because KOTOR2 was not as likable as its predecessor


Picture is fake and more likely a candidate for the Bam your gay article


4.Lego RockBand



Seriously


Is this what we the gamer who enjoys playing fake instruments because we are much to ham fisted, lazy and generally ashamed of our outward appearance? Is this what we have reduced the industry to? Yes and we should all be disappointed in ourselves.


3.Tales of Vesperia

GameCover:: 

"It cannot be done!" they mumbled loudly, if such a thing were possible. "Review six of the greatest pieces of fantasy ever created in one slapdash article without giving away the stories?! Mental!"
'Pah', said I. And began to read and write...

"When one is deeply absorbed in such recounting, it is surprising how much detail one can recall. Not all of the memories I summon up are painful."

Over a score of years ago, Robin Hobb began writing the six finest pieces of 'soft' fantasy I have ever read.
This is no small accolade, fantasy literature has always been something of a passion for me, and from Anne Macaffrey to Asimov I've happily devoured an appreciable chunk of the genre.

The books in question are the Farseer Trilogy, 'Assassin's Apprentice', 'Royal Assassin' and 'Assassin's Quest'. And the Tawny Man trilogy, 'Fool's Errand', 'The Golden Fool' and 'Fool's Fate'.

Between these six books they tell, from the first person perspective - the entire life of Fitzchivalry Farseer, a remarkable man living in remarkable time.

The tale is set in an almost medieval world, in the Kingdom of the Six Duchies, ruled over by the family of Farseers. So far, so olde world fiction. There's even magic, but more on that later.
The Story of Fitzchivalry, a royal bastard, begins with his foster father abandoning him to the mercies of the Prince that begat him. Six years old, he is thrust into a world of soldiers and political intrigue in which he is suddenly a rather dangerous and vulnerable game piece. His arrival causes his father to abdicate his claim to the throne, and gives his scheming uncle, Prince Regal, another leg up towards the succession.
His surrogate grandfather, the king starts shaping him into a tool he can use for the good of the throne - a diplomat and assassin, but in doing so twists him into something wholly different.

Welcome to another SimpleCyanide top 10 list! This week we give you the Gayest moments in Videogaming.

If you are yourself gay then please don't be offended by this article, but instead feast your eyes on the sumptuous moments of gay gaming history. Heck, feel free to loosen those leather trousers, pop out the butt plug and have a good old rummage to these gayer than gay moment...



10) Fable - Experimenting

Fable, a masterpiece of a game - giving you the choice to craft your hero into whatever you desire, be you good, evil or gay...



More often than not, while dancing or farting for an enthralled crowd you would think yourself a big - manly man as every woman in the vicinity fell in love with you. But what's this? A heart over the head of a swarthy gentleman? Well i'm flattered but... oh you too? Well... i always open to new experiences...
BAM - you've taken him to a tavern for some sweet bum love and you're gay.



9) Halo 1, 2 and 3- Teabagging

Halo, you all know what it's about. Super soldier master chief blowing up the best part of a species once a game in an orgy of well orchestrated FPS mayhem. Brilliant games, until you get online...



You're just minding your own buisness when Bang! Some crafty beggars popped out from behind a rock and shotgunned you to death. Ah well - nothing to do now but respawn right?
Wrong. Mr. Shotgun comes up to your poor, defenceless corpse, and while you are forced to watch through the deathcam - gently squats on your face. Again and again...
BAM - balls in your mouth and you're gay.

There are things! horrible things that should not exist.
Saw the videogame is with out doubt one of them.



What could be wrong with a saw videogame you ask. Well lets begin with the 5 key signs it wont be enjoyable.


1. its made to be released at the same time as the sixth film. So its a movie tie in of a film series not deemed suitable for games till past its fifth iteration. Now film tie-in does not mean terrible there was a time in my younger years where things were still out of my reach where film tie-ins were great fantastic however the problems seemed to surface around the time 3D came into play.


2. Its a puzzle game. Now puzzle games are by all in all fantastic and a great way to whittle away the time. The problem here is its a series of Timed puzzles. Now the inclusion of the timer is going to make puzzles either stupidly easy with mash this to win unequally hard and its something rarely balanced right.


3. Content. WHAT CONTENT!!! its like a CSI game. Whoops been done already. The point of Saw was that each version seemed to tell 3 interlinked stories. So why pick One when none of them would make a good videogame. Unless you do the serial killing a bit like Evil genius that could work.


4."Because we have leadership in the survival horror genre, we're passionate about it and wanted to find another property on par with 'Silent Hill," explained David Daniels, director of marketing for Konami. This guy is reason 4. David here does not seem to grasp the genre of what the saw game should be. It is in no way a survival horror game and likening it to Silent hill is the out the arse manner of speaking that's going to send this shooting down the tubes to the waste bins.


5. They should have made a game about this guy.
At least it would be entertaining.

Miniboss out.

I enjoy playing games where I mercilessly maraud around shooting futuristic weaponry at my friends hoping that my shots meet their target to dismember them. I rarely take a moment to think about the guns that I’m firing but upon reflection, here are my top 10 badass guns of all time.


10. Hammer of Dawn - Gears of War
Put simply - who wouldn’t want an orbital death satellite canon at there disposal?





Guns like this have appeared before in games such as the Ion Painter in Unreal Tournament, but the Hammer of Dawn has unlimited ammo if your not multi-playering and only limitations is the time limit on the beam and the fact you have to have a clear sky...


Apart from that its all good!




9. Redeemer - Unreal Tournament
The Redeemer, a hand held nuclear missile silo with a impressive blast radius - which you'd fully expect from a nuclear warhead.





Even better you can remotely guide the missile to your target, sneaky players could glide up to the other team from behind and let them know that they are there by making contact with a players head unleashing an utterly devastating explosion, just don’t let them see you while your doing it!




8. Spartan Laser - Halo 3
A big red death laser ... sounds right up my street. Designed for anti vehicle use but is also superb in anti personnel use. This highly charged energy laser beam will destroy anything you point it at.


Put in the right hands the Spartan Laser usually leaves opposing players waiting for their respawn.





Just image if you could dual wield it!




7. Lancer - Gears of War